BLOG OF POOTENHEIMER... Fear it, Love it
Yes, it's my birthday. And yes, I'm OLD. It's not really anything particularly special. I don't grow or lose any specific appendages or body organs. But since we live using a decimal system, this particular celebration of my day of birth is notable. I am THIRTY. It's a little depressing, because I'm now seeing ads on Facebook about "Women Over 30". It was a good picture, I'll give you that. But still.
I know, I KNOW, I'm still relatively young, but it just makes me realize - life moves on whether you want it to or not. So I was thinking about things. Introspection, as I tend to do on a regular basis. Thinking about who I am, and who I want to be. Who do I want to be? I want to be a good person. That's pretty much it, the rest is just gravy. (Even though I don't like gravy, that means it's GOOD.) I'm looking at Americans in general, how they age. I have the good fortune of coming from parents who both look about ten years younger than they actually are. So yes, I look a bit younger than I actually am. Especially when I'm not wearing glasses or facial hair. Perhaps that's the reason I spontaneously decided to shave all mine off for the first time in years. It's weird. I still don't completely recognize myself in the mirror. But I've gotten complements, so I think I'm leaving it this way for a while.
That, and then doing some revisions on diet and exercise. Yes, I still do plenty of kung fu, but I'm thinking about going back to the Navy SEAL workout. I did it once before, and it put some serious muscle on me. It might be an interesting change to try out. The main thing I'd have to do is give up almost all soft drinks. Which would be a major change for me. I mean seriously - I'm a computer scientist. That's a given staple of our diet. That, and pizza, naturally. Giving up pizza and Pepsi will be very hard, but I think it might be worth a shot.
And the rest of things are on the work-related issues. Working for a living, doing things that I personally want to do. My business partner and I will be doing two projects, and then after that, it's time to focus on my marketing. I think if I put some full-time work into it, I can make at least enough to live off of. Perhaps more. We'll see how it goes, but I WILL need to motivate myself in a serious manner. I have the tools necessary - now it's just time to use them.
Anyway - it's time to get back to relaxing for my birthday, for the last few hours of the night (even though it's now technically no longer my birthday). So that means random link for you. Not too random - I did mention it before. But if you're interested in what I'll be doing to get in better shape, here you go.
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Sorry for offtopic
Sorry for offtopic
Life moves on, sometimes quickly
So things are progressing. It's late, and I'm pensive, so this may be an interesting blog post.
I'm starting a new business with a rather new friend of mine. He recently broke up with his boyfriend (yes, that's correct) of 2 and a half years. Since he lived there, he didn't have another place to go. Since we're working together, it made some sense for the decision to be made to have him move in with me. I have two rooms I wasn't really using, anyway, and now I'm getting paid for the use of them, so that's a definite positive thing. Yes, new roommate, new business, things are CHANGING.
It seems like this is something that's happening to not just me, but several of my friends. There have been a variety of breakups and moving. I had my ex move out, the business partner move in. Another friend of mine moved into a house with her fiance, and now it seems that relationship has shattered and he's moving out. It's been rather stressful for her, because he's not handling it well. She's been hanging out with all of us, the group of friends who all seemed to mesh together at once (including the new roommate). And apparently has already found another guy within the group, but it seems like the two of them getting together was inevitable, if she was going to ever be single again. Which she is.
So YES. Chaos. That is life. And sometimes it can be good, sometimes it can be bad. As it is, now I'm still working through finishing up the move. This week has been filled with that, and determining how to manage finances until the first paychecks roll through.
Love life still mystifies me. I'm turning 30 at the end of the month (yes, I am OLD), and am single yet again. It makes me wonder if I'm being too picky. I did finally make contact with a crush I've had for four years. That's a very long story, but suffice it to say, it's also how I met a lot of my new friends. After much deliberation and introspection, I've decided it's not someone I should "hold out" for. It made me sad to come to that decision, because it was one of those dreams always sitting at the back of my head, the "what if". To see it fall is slightly depressing. I did learn (yet again) that it's dangerous to put someone on a pedestal. With almost no exceptions, people placed in such a precarious position cannot possibly hold up to all expectations. And yes, after getting to know this girl better, I did find some (in my opinion) flaws. It made me quite disappointed to find out what her limitations were, and what type of person she really was. I had hoped for more. That, and the fact that she had a shot at ME (who, in my opinion, was the epitome of a SPLENDID CATCH for her, in particular) and gave it up means all her marbles are not in the right place.
There is still soap opera developments to be potentially unraveled in the future, as we're set to take salsa lessons together (with some other friends), as well as go see Nine Inch Nails together, in concert. It might make things interesting. And if some of the facets of her personality that I found distasteful DO change, then there'd be a possibility for something in the future. But I'm not holding my breath. Just makes me mad I do find her so attractive, and I can't turn that OFF.
So yes - the business. You may be wondering what it is. If I were you, I know I would be wondering. What is it? Well, it's actually something I've been thinking about for years, but it was tricky to find a way in... game development. To do it for a major console is almost impossible with a small company. So we're starting small. iPhone gaming. We'll see how well it does, but I'll say this about the first app - it's pretty freakin' cool. It's addictive like crazy, which is good. And very basic, the idea is novel, I think it should do okay. Hopefully enough to pay some extra bills. When we release it, I'll post the details, but until then, it's SECRET. Nondisclosure, all that.
That's most of it. Kung fu continues, as always. I've recovered a bit. I've been thinking about the fact I've been doing it now for close to nine years. And the idea that a lot of 200+ pound guys get twitchy and nervous if I raise my arms around them in class makes me think my skills have gotten to a decent point. I have had several people ask me why I haven't entered in the full contact matches, and it's making me start to wonder about trying it. I'd have to change my diet and increase my exercise routine in a large way, but I think it could be interesting. Still considering it.
Anyway, that's enough for tonight, I think. I'll leave you with two vids I stumbled across that I actually was surprised at the quality of, primarily because it's from CollegeHumor.com. But they're good enough to pass on. One is a trailer to a potentially upcoming movie, and the other is how I think rap should be.
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Changes happen all at once
I've said it before, but I think it's very true. When things in your life change, they have a tendency to change in several ways at once. That's happening for me, and I think it's still in progress.
Work is the one place that people spend their life. Eight hours a day (usually, or more), five days a week. That takes the majority of your life. It affects how you feel, who you are. I had quit my job at IBM, mainly because I didn't like the pressure with the work from having expectations to work on increasing levels of work without any extra compensation or assistance. And a large level of stress was lifted when I left. So I went to another company, a small company with only a few people. It seemed very good, doing work on machines that are top of the line, with all necessary software. I was put on a fairly large project. And the more I worked, the less exciting the job started seeming.
Anyway, changes. Yeah, I don't work there anymore. And I'm taking a risk by going into something completely independent. But I think it was only a matter of time before I got there. This might be it. I'll give details when I figure it out.
So the girlfriend is done. No more model girlfriend - although I will admit, I probably will NEVER AGAIN. Guys all (on some level) think it'd be awesome to date a model. But I think they might be a little overly dramatic for my tastes. And I'm still being nice to her, and I think we'll probably be friends on some level. I think I need people a little more grounded. Not someone who's eager to launch off to a new life every couple of months.
Been making new friends, hanging out with different people, and I think life's been changing for the better. I think it has potential to get even better - I can hope, at least.
That's some of the latest. And kung fu STILL GOES. We had our tournament yesterday and I'm STILL tired. Started at 8, finished at 11 PM. Two tournaments, actually. First was a normal tournament, where I competed and did lion dancing AND was in charge of some self-defense demonstrations. I stayed busy. Then after that, the full contact tournament. I didn't compete, but I was a judge. Ring-side seat. Very good. Some of the fights were great, particularly one with one of our students. He came to us to learn how to fight, and was in the super heavyweight division. The guy he fought was pretty scary looking, but he actually used what we trained him for. I've worked personally with him a lot, so I was particularly proud when he used his new skills to pound the tar out of the other guy. The crowd was going crazy. He ended up winning the first two rounds by decision, it was a great fight.
Random link time! I found a good one for you. I'm a big nerd, and a lot of people reading probably are too. So you should appreciate this.
And we're back
Apparently there are at least a few (very important) people who still check this silly blog. So it's back on!
I'll have to take another day to catch up on things a bit. My life is currently going through one of those life-changing all-at-once happenings. Multiple women issues to deal with, job stuff, kung fu continuing onward, side business stuffs. Mainly the first two things. Which is actually more than just two.
But yes. I'll post some more, not sure how often, but it will be regular as oat bran. And of course, plenty of random linking. Ah yes! I did get a Mac. Finally caved. It's quite nice (I'm on it now). And it's made me appreciate HD and the finer qualities of high quality imagery. This fits right into all of it.
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as of 10/23/03